And Jesus Said Unto Them, “Go Scream at Mannequins in Target”

And seeing the multitudes, Jesus went up on a mountainside and sat down. His disciples came to him, and he began to teach them. And Jesus said unto them, “Go, be hateful, and scream at mannequins in Target.”

And, wary, his disciples asked, “What is a Target?”

But Jesus did not give them the answer they desired, and instead made haste with his words.

“Veril…