How I Spent $300 Billion Planning the World Cup

“Mind-boggling estimates of up to $300 billion have been given for the total infrastructure spending over the past decade.”

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Hi! I’m the guy who planned the World Cup this year, and I am getting absolutely hounded with the same question, over and over: “How on this godforsaken petri dish of a planet did you spend 300 billion dollars on this?”

Well, first of all, you have to understand: it’s really hard to estimate how many soccer balls are going to be used in the World Cup. I refuse to be underprepared, so I ordered 100 billion soccer balls.