How To Retire By Age 165

So, you’ve decided you want to retire! That’s wonderful, it’s important to dream big. If you follow this simple plan, you should be able to quit your job(s) by age 165.

Invest
Investing is an incredibly important step toward retiring by age 165. This includes putting money into an IRA or 401(k)—but with inflation the way it is, and the fact that the stock market may cease to exist by the time you turn 165, traditional investments won’t be enough. Where you really need to put your money is in the Next Big Thing, like Bitcoin. But don’t invest in actual Bitcoin. That would push your retirement age to approximately never.

Prepare For The Unexpected
No one knows what the world will look like when you turn 165. You need to brace yourself for surprising challenges alongside a drastically different global landscape. We may end up coming together as a global community to address climate change head-on, or we may go Children of Men on each other, or we may eventually all be ruled by alien overlords. Nothing is for sure. The only thing that’s guaranteed when you turn 165 is that the show Survivor will still be on, and Jeff Probst will still be hosting. So, maybe invest in Jeff Probst? Is that possible? Look into it.