Moments You May Have Missed at the Oscars
Most everything at the Oscars this year was overshadowed by The Slap, so here’s a recap of moments you may have missed at the 94th Academy Awards:
Benedict Cumberbatch stood up at one point and shouted, “Eggs Benedict! That’s what I’m named after! So I’ve decided to go by Eggsy! Everyone call me Eggsy, it’s much easier to remember how to say!” Then he stopped shouting, but he stayed standing for the rest of the night.
Kristen Stewart sat in the wrong seat, but it all worked out because it happened in the Uber ride. She sat in the correct seat at the theater.
In between commercial breaks, Andrew Garfield ran down an aisle pretending to sling webs from his wrists, but stayed completely silent. When he arrived at his row of chairs, he whispered to Denzel Washington, “You know I’m just acting, right? I’m not actually Spider-Man.”
When Dune lost to CODA, Denis Villeneuve shouted, “I read that whole boring book for nothing?!” and stormed out.
Nicole Kidman shushed everyone in the audience and, when they were all nice and quiet, announced, “I have over one million dollars at home, and so do a lot of people in this room!”
Steven Spielberg nodded to himself quietly. His publicist says he didn’t mean to do it, and he apologizes to everyone involved.
Hans Zimmer sang the word “BOOONNNGGGG” for two minutes instead of giving an acceptance speech. Then he continued to “sing” a score for the Oscars for the rest of the night.
Bradley Cooper pissed his pants.
When he didn’t win, Paul Thomas Anderson yelled, “But I made a movie about pizza!! Who doesn’t like pizza?!”
During her acceptance speech, Ariana DeBose muttered, “Steven Spielberg, I will never forgive you for the nod you did earlier, no matter how much you didn’t mean to do it.”
Lin-Manuel Miranda performed a wonderful, uplifting flash mob on his way home, but no one else joined in, and so it actually looked very weird.
Q&A About This Piece:
Q: Did any of these actually happen?
A: You’d know, if you were watching closely.
Q: Well, clearly I was distracted by what Will Smith did, so can you tell me? Did any of these things actually happen?
A: Unfortunately, I was distracted, too.
Q: So you don’t know, either? Because they all sound made-up.
A: Yeah, but if I hadn’t seen it, and then someone told me about it, the Will Smith thing would sound made-up too.
Q: Good point.
A: Steven Spielberg definitely nodded quietly to himself, though. That one is true.
Q: That absolute sicko.
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That’s all for this week—thanks for reading! Goodbye.